First Blog

Hello blogasphere. Do I know anything about blogging? Absolutely not. Have I spent more than 10 mintues reading blogs in my life? No. Should you read this? Of course. I have always thought blogging was for people with no life. So let's get started. My main focus will be sports but I will also write about anything that bothers me, I think is funny or my personal experiences. The less I have to do at work the longer the posts. With that introduction I know you are at the edge of your seat, salivating, and waiting for what comes next. Here we go.

Let me start by saying anyone who is a fan of the Dallas Cowboys is welcome to read but has more of a chance of experiencing a Dallas playoff victory (which would be their first since 95) than enjoying this during football season. The way the Redskins, (my favorite team in any sport) went into Dallas and destroyed the supposed best team in the NFL brought a tear to my eye and drove my tab at the sports bar to epic proportions. My friends and every random person in the bar decided (after a few pitchers) any Redskins score or shot of Jerry Jones face had to be followed by a jaeger bomb. Has anyone noticed that Jerry Jones looks more and more like a wooden puppet every year? I half expect him to start yelling "I'm a real boy" on the sideline when no one on the team acknowledges his presence. Another question, Does Wade Phillips face not show the same kind of shocked exuberance after a big play that a redneck shows when his metal finder starts beeping frantically on the beach? A Fox sideline guy was holding one of those mini UFOs that catches sound over his head when Romo hit Witten for the first score and I swear I heard him yell, "Phyllis grab the kids and get the hell over here I think I am going to be rich."
As if the victory wasn't enough the fact that T.O. imploded again after the game added to my state of euphoria. A year after crying "when you criticize my quarterback its not fair," he does the same thing. He might have, "25 million reasons to be alive" but apparently getting the ball thrown to him almost that many times wasn't enough. The Cowboys undoubtedly have a great team and will name the score this week against the Bengals but to see my Redskins go in there and dominate this Sunday gives hope to the notion they will choke again in the playoffs. What a great Sunday.

Random thing that bothers me: I will try to do one of these for every post. Again the excitement is earth shattering. Today it is the new fad at sporting events to throw food into the stands.
I was at a Pistons (my favorite NBA team) game against the Wizards in our nations' capital when I first witnessed this debacle. During one of the timeouts the announcer, who is actually that Big Tigger guy from the basement on BET, bellows, "Get ready for the Spirit Squad." I expected a bunch of guys who love Clay Aiken to run out in tights and do cartwheels but what happened was suprisingly worse.
Twenty people holding Chipotle burritos storm the court while trying to pump up the crowd. I thought it was an eating contest and we were picking our favorite contestant. Instinctively I began cheering for the girl in front of my section that weighed 80 pounds because the Wizards were on a run and when she threw up on the floor I thought it might kill the home team's momentum. Then it happened. One of the guys threw a burritto into the stands.
I immediately expected security to come tackle him, but no, this was actually his job. They were feeding us! Are you serious? The worst part is fans actually wanted to eat these pepto bismol advertisements covered in tin foil. Runny, cold Burrittos are carroming of the steps and seats going 100 mph and people are fighting over them. One guy (I will let you guess what he looked like) after pushing a young child over to get his prize actually opened the burritto, held it over his head like he was Scorpion and the burritto was Sub Zero's heart and took a massive bite. As the beans ran down his face and the section erupted I wished for the first time in my life I was in Europe.