Zorn to be Bad?

Bones hopes everyone in the blogasphere had a happy Thanksgiving and that the amount of food eaten made up for those two horrendous football games during the day. If you must know I had a great four day break from my extremely draining and demanding job that was supposed to culminate with a glorious Sunday afternoon at FedEx field. However, what I witnessed up close and personal on Sunday was anything but glorious.

One of my college roommates (Wanz) and his wife (Marissa) have started a tradition that is second only to that of the Mistletoe. Inexplicably, for two straight years they have decided to take one of my friends (Geoff) and I (Bones) to a Redskins game on their anniversary. Last year the four of us witnessed a fourth quarter collapse at the hands on the Eagles. The sting of the loss was not nearly as painful as having to listen to those colzone inhaling chiefs chant E-A-G-L-E-S as we exited the stadium. But this was a new year. We had a police escort to the game, seats four rows up on the 40 behind the Redskins bench and a case of liquid courage as we entered the parking lot. It did not matter that it was forty degrees and raining we would not be denied. What we would not be denied of I am not entirely sure because I did not expect a Redskins victory but we would not be denied.

While walking to our seats I was thinking about what phrase I could yell over and over that would both insult Giants fans and form a banter with those supporting the Burgundy & Gold. When a man with the dimensions of Charlie Weiss walked by me wearing a Plaxico Burress jersey it hit me. Plaxico Burress just shot himself in the leg, Eminem's friend Cheddar Bob shot himself in the leg in 8 Mile. (By the way, what was up with Eminem's posse in that movie. A white go whose IQ did not approach room tempature, a guy pushing 3 bills and a dork. I just never got it. I guess that is why they shot paint ball guns and burned down old buildings for fun.) For the next 3 hours I yelled Cheddar Bob every five minutes and I have to be honest, it never got old. Even the Giants fans loved it. As we kept climbing down stairs and getting closer and closer to the players of my favorite team I just kept telling myself if they keep it close this will be the best day of my life.

As we settled into our seats, literally 30 feet from the players, I began to observe the fellow fans we would be sharing the next 3 hours with. The second most important aspect of going to a game, next to your team winning, is who you sit around. It was obvious the surrounding crowd would not equal the previous year's when we witnessed a human being rise from the dead. The man directly in front of us, who went a little to hard in pre-game warm ups, was passed out the entire first half. We referred to him as Weekend at Bernie's until, while I was trying to take advantage of a priceless Facebook moment by getting a picture with him, he suddenly regained conciousness. He preceded to grab me by my jersey, whisper "Let's Go Skins" in my ear, and cheer vehemently the entire second half. This Lazurus like performance was not repeated by anyone in our section but all in all we could not complain.

However, Bones did have complaints about what was going on the field. First off Tony Siragusa was on the field just like last year and that is the only reason I was glad the weather was so bad. When the game actually started it was obvious not even "the goose" could have helped the Skins. The Giants controlled the offensive and defensive line from the first play of the game and the 13-7 score at halftime only masked their domination. As the Oreo licking King ran out the clock, the rain poured down and I lost feeling in all apendages I experienced the hallowing feeling a sports fan has when he realizes his team is simply not that good. One of the many negative aspects of getting older is that you become more realistic as a fan. I can remember when I was a junior in high school betting 10 kids $5 each the Redskins would make the playoffs when their record was 0-5. Sadly, with a game coming up at Baltimore, Dallas playing well and 2 NFC South teams somehow sporting 9-3 records I would not make that same bet today.